i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
