i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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