Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
