I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
