I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
