Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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