how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
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