Are we in a gay sports bar?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize