Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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