I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I got chris browned last night
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
It's official drugs can't kill me
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Found your dick twin last night
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
