Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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