He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
