why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
