the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
