Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
