it's too hot outside to masturbate.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
