He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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