She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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