remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize