Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
