did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
If its not for food we ain't going out.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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