I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
