how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Randomize
