lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
