My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
