I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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