Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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