we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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