therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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