I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize