farters have to be the big spoon...
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
