How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
my sisters under your porch take her home
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Don't EVER smell your tampon
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
