How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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