Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
