we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
