just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
