think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
