You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
All the doctor said was why
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
