My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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