My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Randomize
