The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
