It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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