talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
