9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
