im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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