READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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