You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Randomize
