garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Randomize
