Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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