Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Randomize
