My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
